This week was one of the best weeks of my life. Jeff and I were able to take the kids out of school and go to Disneyland for three days. We checked off another item off my 39 list and witnessed the sheer joy of Samantha meeting Mickey Mouse and his friends. I don’t know if I’ve ever experienced anything truly better than a toddler belly laugh and/or squeal.
Jeff and I witnessed Rebecca and Ben being excited to introduce Emily and Samantha to their favorite Disney rides. And then on the last night, we let the older 3 kids go explore the park by themselves for a couple of hours. They loved the independence and Jeff and I watched the parade while Samantha was sacked out in the stroller.
Our adventure concluded with a trip to Temecula to have our pictures taken by Wendy and Tyler of Blue Lily Photography.
We arrived at Tyler’s parent’s home and had our pictures taken in a beautiful meadow with wispy tall green grass and a gorgeous setting sun. We were relaxed, the kids were giggly, and Samantha was in heaven popping bubbles. But my favorite part, hands down was meeting Wendy and Tyler.
Tyler has this infectious grin and Wendy has this “I want to sit, drink coffee, and talk to you about real life” type of personality. Laid back, yet adventurous. No pomp. No circumstance. Just real people. As I have said countless times, I love real, authentic people.
Wendy and Tyler recently sold all their personal belongings and are traveling the world taking pictures and videos, while exploring all this world has to offer and homeschooling their 2 beautiful children. I was (and am) in awe of their lifestyle.
Rebecca, my oldest daughter, is an amazing judge of character. She is very careful with who she allows into her inner circle. But once in her circle, she is the most loyal person I know. So when we were driving away, she said to Jeff, “I asked Wendy to come to our house for dinner. I think they are going to be some of my best friends. Are they on facebook?”
I was speechless. I just grabbed Jeff’s hand and looked out the window. I was energized from meeting such contented people and also moved by Rebecca’s ability to quickly connect and recognize two people of such stellar character. I was nearly brought to tears and just really spent some quiet time looking out the window and reflecting upon my dreams and the desires I have for myself and my family.
So this morning, I was still living off this high as I was uploading vacation photos at a local coffee shop. A lady sat down next to me and was talking to her husband on the phone. Here was what I heard,
“Thanks honey. I really want this job…. Thanks for believing in me… Thanks for supporting us while I’m searching for the right fit…”
Then a man approaches her and I’m now sitting 2 feet away from them during her job interview. She was such a passionate candidate. She was innovative, darling, and a wonderful communicator. I wanted to hire her. The gentleman left a lot to be desired and soon I heard more about him than I wanted to hear. He was and is the best pharmaceutical sales person known to man – at least that is what he said, no less than 10 times!
The interview finishes up and she walks out with a confident smile. I wanted to shout, “You’ve got it girl. You are a shoe-in!”
Then in walks candidate #2 – Forgive me here. This young lady was dressed very provocatively and was so painfully exposed. I wanted to offer her my jacket. She started to speak, and it was ten times more painful. She lacked communication skills, couldn’t answer any of the questions, and admitted she was fired from her last job for lack of direction. The interview was horrible. Within 2 minutes though of her entrance, I was unsure if the pharmaceutical rep was interviewing her for a job or a date. I was beyond discouraged.
When the second candidate left, he immediately got on the phone and told his counterpart or boss that he was hiring the second candidate. I was obviously distracted and not getting my own work done. And to make matters worse, that darling first candidate was now going to get a rejection letter and be devastated. I found myself surprisingly angry and heartbroken for the first candidate that I didn’t even know personally.
And then I did it… I looked at the man with a not so pleasant smirk. Yikes. Totally not my normal disposition at all.
He got off the phone and asked, “What was that look for?” I quickly shook my head like a coward, not able to express what I had just dished out. But then he asked again, “No really. What was that look for?”
And then I took a deep breath and I did it again…
I eloquently said, “I can’t believe you. You are such a douche bag.” Double yikes. I was trying to grab the words back but I just couldn’t. And douche bag, Jenny? Really? When was the last time, if ever, did you use that phrase? 1988?
I proceeded to tell him that his interview skills were lacking and that his ability to pick out a good employee with an innovative personality and great communication skills were obviously less than stellar. I had no filter. None at all.
Being such a people pleaser, I rarely stir the pot. But I found myself just unbelievably discouraged after being so inspired the night before. Perhaps that was the reason I was so sensitive to this young lady and her situation. She was working hard towards her dreams and for her desire to help provide for her family. I could feel her disappointment and she hadn’t even been let down yet.
So today, I’m sorry Mr. Pharmaceutical Sales Rep. I’m sorry for calling you a douche bag. I should have just said, “That’s a poor choice. Your choice was very douche baggy.” Is that an adjective?
And Miss First candidate, I hope to run into you again at this coffee shop or at the grocery store. This company and this boss are not worthy of you. You and your husband will succeed and perhaps this “No” will be just what you need to push you towards another opportunity to find the perfect “Yes”.
So I confess. I called somebody a douche bag. I confess that I needed to offer more grace to him. But I also confess that I think part of my anger was directed towards myself, as I know there have been other times in my life where I have been shallow and pathetic. And I beg forgiveness if I’ve ever caused anyone pain, heartache, or tears because of my poor priorities, critical spirit, or shallowness.
And thank you Wendy and Tyler for living your dreams. Your example was a treasured gift that I needed to receive at this precise point in my life.
And I promise you dear readers and friends to never type the words douche bag on my blog ever again.
Blessings sweet friends – Jenny